International Women's Day 2011 And What I Did For It

Today marks 100th International Women's Day.  Usually I take this day to talk about how I'm very lucky to live in a country where I have rights as so many women around the world do not.  I also talk about how thankful I am to the women who fought for those rights, and how we need to appreciate everything they went through to do that.

This year I decided to talk about something different.  I decided at 7:30am this morning after I watched this


It's about my label... and it's about a post.  A post that I have re-written several times.  A post I submitted to a few sites regarding my family situation.  No one ever published it.  I figured my story wasn't worth it then.  I made me think it was too harsh for others to hear.

Until this morning.....

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The Truth Is...  I'm a Single Mom

But I’ll never tell you that when I first meet you. Why? Because you’ll treat me differently. It’s happened before. It’s like the episode of Sex In The City when Miranda is trying to buy an apartment and she says “It’s just me” everyone is taken aback by it all.


I wasn’t always single, but at no point after my son was born did I refer to myself as a Married Mom, so why would I start calling myself a Single Mom? I’m a Mom and a good one at that! (cue the roaring crowd).

I love meeting people. I love hearing their stories. I dislike when they start out with “Well I’m a Single Mom” I just smile and nod. Your marital status should have no bearing on who you are. It’s about you, not who you’re with. If you are married and happy that’s great! If you’re single and happy why can’t that be great too?

Apparently a lot don’t see it that way. Once people do find out that I’m single I hear the most awkward things “but you seem so cheerful I would have never guessed you’re alone” or “do you find the holidays tough financially and emotionally being a Single Mom?” I don’t know how to respond to those statements. I usually just stammer something about I’m fine and all is well, but really I think that the person inquiring thinks less of me.

Really what is a Married Mom? Obviously she’s a Mom that’s married.

What is a Single Mom, well that’s a whole new can a of worms

She could have always been single, and raised a child on her own. She could have been married then widowed. She could be divorced with full custody. She could be divorced with split custody. The scenarios are endless. Great Moms are great no matter the circumstances. We all run kids activities, wipe runny noses, wash too many loads of laundry, and wish for a few more hours of sleep.

That’s the group I want to be in with. So The Truth is … I’m a Mom
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There is it my label about me being ME
Thanks to Mabels Lables for sparking something what would have been labeled as just another TUESDAY Morning.

How Tweestock Made Brantford My 2nd Home

It all started on Twitter (of course it did, all the great things do).

@unmarketing 's Scott Stratten sent out a tweet.  He was working on the #unbook at the time & asked how business owners felt about Trade Shows.  I messaged back asking him if he would be interested in hearing about it from a show organizer's point of view (I am never afraid to ask, I figure the worst people can say to me is no & I'm okay with that).  Scott said SURE & I was very excited to be given this opportunity.  Fast forward several months and not only did Scott read my take on it, HE QUOTED ME IN THE UNMARKETING BOOK!

(this is my current claim to fame.  I spent most of the summer saying, not only am I in a Book, I'm in a book THAT PEOPLE ARE READING-this is a big deal to this little KW Gal). 

I can't thank Scott enough.  It's brought a lot of attention to MeFest and my co-host Diane & I are eternally grateful for it.
But we're also thankful for a whole other reason.
We gained a new set of Friends because of it.  They live in Brantford Ontario.

Diane and I headed off to the Unmarketing Book Launch in Sept 2010.
It was the first time I got to meet @LindseyJay face to face.  She brought @Trevor_Cherewka with her.  The four of us chatted about tweetups and how they have so many in Toronto and area, but that's a lot of travelling for us.  Lindsay said that Trevor organizes Tweetstock in Brantford and how fun it was.  We said that it's just down the road from KW & we would love to attend the next one.

A few weeks later Trevor messaged me asking me if we would speak at the next Tweetstock.  I agreed, but unfortunately Diane wasn't available.  This posed a bit of a problem.  If you know or follow me, I'm very social.  I love the back and forth of a conversation, coming up with ideas, learning about new things, so this would be easy right?  I found myself standing in front of a group of people talking to them about using twitter in an engaging way, only to find out most of them weren't on twitter.  So my talk became a bit of a ramble but after the speaking part I went back to having convos with the people in attendance and really loved how they were open to trying twitter (and taking Tiara pics!).

Since then I have been back to Brantford several times and my new pals have come to events in KW as well.  I was so excited to hear that the @TweetstockCA team were going to have both @KathyBuckworth and Scott Stratten for #Tweestock4 , but then quickly saddened by the fact it was the same day as TEDxWaterloo.  Just because I didn't think I could make it work it didn't stop me from helping my pals get the word out about such an #EPIC event!  It took until the week of the event to get all the quirks worked out so that Diane & I could arrange to GO TO TWEETSTOCK4 !!!  Yes I was that excited when I found out I could be there.  Upon arrival we were welcomed with open arms Literally (I warn people that I hug & take lots of pics).  The event was fantastic take a look here.  We had friends from London to Oakville that made the trip and the energy in the room that day was UN-believable (see how I threw that in there).

Hours later we arrived at the after party only for me to realize that I left my camera behind.  All of my pals hopped on twitter (remember the people who didn't have twitter just months earlier) and were messaging the organizers and the @SandersonCentre to let them know what had happened.  The following day I was informed that my camera was found and for fun Trevor tweeted out that a camera was found.  So many tweets came in saying that it belongs to @Those2Girls .  It made me feel so good to know that so many people were looking out for me.

As you can see I do have my camera back in my possession and speaking with Diane I said, once this weather breaks I can see us spending most of our time in Brantford (aka now my 2nd home). 

Should you Buy Local JUST BECAUSE they are LOCAL?

This post is a jump off from my facebook wall earlier this week.  If you're my pal on facebook it can be found here http://www.facebook.com/lisamcdonald122/posts/110348422373884

The gist of it was that my pals made a vlog at a Williams Coffee Pub.  It was brought to their attention that there are a lot of locally owned cafes in KW and that they shouldn't give their money to a CHAIN.

I have experienced both sides of this.  For the better part of my life I worked for a franchise, now I work for a small business, so I feel I can speak about this fairly.

Many people think that working for a popular franchise means constant money coming in.  It doesn't.  There are quotas to be met, if they aren't, hours get cut and a lot of pressure is put on the staff.  So by deciding to avoid these places affects the paycheques of the employees and their working environment.

Small businesses have a lot of challenges too, as they strive to stay original in order to compete in a market with sometimes much larger competition.

FOR ME, it all comes down to CUSTOMER SERVICE!

I have gone into a chain store and have felt like a number, but I've also gone to chain where everyone there is smiling, chats with me and knows what I want to order.

On the flip side I've gone into small businesses with one location and been greeted warmly and appreciated for the dollars I have spent there, but that is not always the case.  I have also visited small businesses that take one look at my son's hockey button on my coat (which I proudly wear!) and have them stick their noses up and turn the other way.  Apparently Mom Jeans and Hockey pics mean that my cash is not welcome there.

I have tons of stories both good and bad from both types of businesses.  I will always go back to the ones that were friendly and helpful.

Here's a fun fact Williams originated in Stratford (I put Brantford on my Facebook, but either way they are both close to KW) http://www.williamsfreshcafe.com/williams-story
So the by the whole "only LOCAL businesses" logic, that means if a small business becomes successful and expands into different areas you should no longer support them?  What sense does that make?

What influences your choices on where you shop, go to eat, etc?  Do you agree or disagree with my thoughts? I'd love to hear if any of this rings true with you or am I way off base.

Friendships Formed on Facebook/Twitter

You often hear me mention about all the supportive pals I have.  This time I've asked these pals about the Friendships they formed through Facebook/Twitter.

Here are the responses that I received.

"When my BFFF is sad, I shoot myself out of a cannon to cheer her up."

from http://www.theanimatedwoman.com/2010/08/chocolate-assholes.html
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@littlemissmocha Facebook is for people I already know. But on Twitter I have met so so many people I like, respect, appreciate.
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Hi Lisa,
I've been using twitter since '09 but seriously using it since September '10. Since September, I have found amazing people (locally and abroad) that share similar passions to me. By going to tweet-ups and engaging with people via twitter I found some amazing people.
Twitter has enabled me to start a foundation to build a relationship with others, and then meeting them offline has furthered our relationship. Through the ongoing online and offline conversations we have been able to establish a relationship rather quickly because we can talk all the time! Twitter has helped me both professionally and personally grow in my field and strengthen my communication and knowledge to continue to aid people through conflict.

Thanks Lisa, for giving me the opportunity to express just one way that twitter has grown my relationships. Also, thanks for your friendship :)

@Jasondyk   http://www.absolutionmediation.ca/
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Hi Lisa,

@Jurego here from Twitter. I developed a great friendship with @bizaaron over Twitter. Since talking over Twitter, we've actually hung out a few times, went to TweetUps, and was even a guest on a weekly radio show I co-host. It's been great, cause he's given me great advice on things, and is always good for a laugh.
I think this look into friendships online that you're doing is really cool. I'm looking forward to hearing more about them. Thanks!
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@Fleur_de_Lotus
This one is my best story of twitter friendship... with people I have yet to meet: http://thelotuspad.com/2010/12/semper-progedi/.


There is also @CLBuchananPhoto who I first met going to a Guns & Roses concert - that we got on twitter for free - who had me over for Christmas dinner this year as my family is out of town.

And @Beach_Mama who is the sweetest person ever and one of the main reasons I started my blog in the first place and who I spent boxing day with having dinner with our significant others and watching live music :)
There are many others... but those stick out the most.
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@DarlingNicky999
Here are a few quotes or excerpts from "friendship" articles I have written with links to the original article.

"Flip-Flops are for ur feet. Not the way you treat your friendships or relationships". - Darling Nicky

http://www.darlingnicky999.com/2010/08/flip-flops-are-for-your-feet.html

"Friendship" themed tweets I have made as @darlingnicky999

Friendship is not a one-way street. If it is, I'm fully throwing it into reverse
Friendship is about being able to talk about the hard stuff as effortlessly as the good stuff. It's called trust.
Friendship is a simple thing like taking your friend's car through the car wash simply b/c they overheard you say it was dirty.
Friendship doesn't make unreasonable demands on your time. Friendship doesn't have deadlines. Work does.
Friendship is helping one another to accomplish each other's goals.

Friendship is about listening AND hearing what the other has to stay. Not just allowing them to speak.
Friendship should have NO strings attached. If it does, it's not a friendship, it's a puppet show.
Friendship should not involve s-e-x. If it does, you're not friends, you're lovers.
Friendship is supposed to make you feel good. About yourself, about others, about the world around you.
"Friendship should be transparent, with no hidden agendas, no alterior motives. The moment that the balance shifts, honesty is the ONLY thing that can save it."

Here is the quick link on every article I've ever written on "Friendship". Skim through if you like, and feel free to use anything that supports your point of view.

http://www.darlingnicky999.com/search/label/friendship

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@JessAriasCooper
I haven't made many friends via facebook, but I have made quite a few that I talk to regularly on twitter. I was really skeptical of twitter at first, but once I got my bearings and started chatting with people, I totally get what all the hype is about. I've made some great connections with both men and women who I share a ton in common with, as a parent, professional or just in general. I've made some good friends who live all over the world thanks to twitter.

Twitter is a lot like high school. When you walk down the hallway, there are people who you greet with a nod, and then there are few, you just can't wait to see the next time, until eventually, you're relationship blossoms into a true friendship.

Twitter is a badass way to connect with other people. I'd recommend it to anyone.
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@OptiMom
I have access to people all over this marvelous planet that I otherwise would never have met. It is a source of unconditional love and connection to other like-minded people especially those who have a philanthropic dedication to improving one's communities!
xxxooo
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It is because of my “Twitlationships” that I feel connected. When I need a shoulder, I tweeter; when I need to smile, I tweeter; when I need to share, I tweeter; those that response do so because of our “Twitlationships”. As a newcomer to GTA… well to Canada and having only my immediate family as my support, I rely on tweeter as well as Facebook to find resources, solve issues, share and vent. As a result, I have discovered true friendship, shared interests and laughter that I would have never thought possible.

@scribblinmama
 http://www.scribblensplatter.com/

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@Cheryl Peters
Hey Lisa! Here's how our story goes. I met Nolie ( @NoliesPlace) shortly after they announced Blissdom Canada. She was looking for a roommate to share hotel expenses with. I tweeted at her and said I'd be interested. We begun tweeting back and forth, making conversation. Fast forward to the early bird registration. She got in, I didn't. Nolie kept looking for a roommate with little to no luck. 2 tickets actually landed in my lap for Blissdom Canada. So, Nolie told me it was a sign so, I should go to Blissdom. One week before Blissdom, Nolie ws invited to She's connected. I offered to let her stay with me over night I thought about and asked my husband "Do you think i'm weird for inviting someone to our home that I've never met in person?!" He didn't think it was strange since I talked to her several times a day.
So, thankfully, because of Twitter, I have met one of my closest friends!
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http://twitter.com/partymomma

I was into the internet before it was cool.

I started using chat rooms when I was only 12 years old, in 1994. Back then, ‘asl’ was pretty much the terminology and you couldn’t ‘lol’, you could only ‘haha’ if you had to express laughter.

I did grow tired of it at some point, until I was 21 with my first baby, who was about 6 weeks old, and wouldn’t poop. Most new moms who might be feeling nervous with a screaming baby would call their mother, to perhaps, offer advice. Mine, however, seemed to want nothing to do with me or my baby because I had a boy child and not the little girl she told me my whole life “I better have”. And since I didn’t do what she wanted she chose a friend’s birthday party at a bar over coming to the hospital with me when I was in labour and she was one of the last people to visit me after he was born.

So as I sat there holding my 6 week old boy who hadn’t pooped in 3 days I cried along with him until he fell asleep. Then I started looking for information on the internet. I came across a message forum for moms and started reading a bit and I liked what I saw - Moms helping moms.

I joined the site and before I knew it I was on there every day asking questions, answering questions, talking about random things – it was wonderful. Since none of my real life friends had children yet and most of them had pretty much disappeared for a while, it was nice to feel connected to the world through this site and 7 years later I am still friends with a few of those people.

However, most of my real life friends and family thought I was weird to think people online could be ‘real’ or be friends.

We would exchange gifts (kris kringle style) at Christmas time, send flowers when a new baby was born, some even sent birthday gifts. Since most of these ladies were American I used to send them a container of Tim Horton’s Coffee, which was well received.

Since then, I have made friends online from other places as well, including on my xbox360. I enjoy playing Tetris and I was so excited when I found out that I could play Tetris online with people who could actually play; many better than I can. As you play you can talk to each other with the microphone and before I knew it a bunch of us were working on organizing tournaments, texting and talking on the phone.

My family and friends thought I was weird (some still think I am weird) for talking to people through a video game.

And of course, there is the ever so popular social media methods that we are now all accustomed to; Facebook and Twitter. The one place I can talk to strangers and not be labeled as weird. As far as these two mediums go I like to keep Facebook for my real life family and friends and a few select very close online friends and Twitter is for the world.

Facebook is a great way to stay in touch with everyone without taking up much time. It’s easy to leave a quick note, comment on some pictures and be on my way. I can also do those things with noisy children running around; something I can’t do while on the phone.

Twitter is a great place to see things from a multitude of perspectives, meet very interesting people from all walks of life and even feel connected to some favorite celebrities.

The great thing about meeting people online is that people feel comfortable typing. It’s much easier to open up, loosen up and just be yourself online. It’s also nice to sometimes have people to talk to who do not know you for real or know your friends or family. They become people to confide in and vent to in a nonthreatening way.

I love meeting people online and so many wonderful people have helped me through many tough times, brought me laughter, shared tears, and helped cure boredom. I feel sorry for those with closed minds about the value of friendship found online as they are missing out on a valuable tool to finding people to connect with. I am glad the internet is cool now, even though I still usually feel like one of the weird kids.

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@jackiyo

My experience with Twitter has resulted in a life-direction change. Everyone who has been directly involved in helping me see and find my passion was introduced to me through Twitter. My biggest cheering section is on Twitter. My biggest supporters are on Twitter. My customers have come from Twitter. So many opportunities have presented themselves to me because of Twitter. It's incredible. It's so hard to describe the difference. Get on Twitter, push through the dip, and experience the awesomeness.

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@DavidPylyp

Four or five years ago I began my journey of internet marketing that started with a voracious appetite to read everything I could find about webpages and search engine optimization. On a number of different bulletin boards and forums, I kept running across a Canadian Real Estate Broker who responded patiently to my website inquiries.

A few years later I asked about Twitter. He laughed and said its really simple. You follow people and they follow you back. From those simplistic insights @DaveChomitz has guided and inspired my entry into the video marketing arena, youtube syndication and embedding video topics into blogs and [he] does provide a intuitive sounding board for co-collaborative marketing ideas. We have met a few times (IRL) at functions, panels and classes like ReBAR Camp and Real Estate Marketing Summit - remarkto2010. Next is the advent of QR codes and how to apply the technology. At each meeting we share a childlike delight in discovering new concepts that help grow and nurture ideas and "nuggets" of wisdom. This sharing has, I hope enhanced both our careers. Twitter and Facebook have permitted a connection and engagement with like minded people that I would not otherwise be exposed to. @TamaraDorris explained the process and magic of BlogTalk Radio and created a completely new Facebook sphere all the way to Sacramento California. I have the opportunity to read and learn from some great internet marketers about their concepts for drip marketing and Seth Godin's concepts on Tribes of Followers.

A wonderful person told me recently; When the student is ready the teacher will appear.
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Do you have a story about how you formed a friendship on Facebook/Twitter?
Please message me with it
facebook.com/lisamcdonald122

How To Remove A Facebook Virus - Too Many Facebook Apps

Ever get a strange message from a Facebook Friend? Next time instead of sending a DON'T SPAM ME message, let them know they have a facebook virus and send them the link to this post on how to get rid of it.

I thought I should update this post, as the facebook platform has changed a bit since I orginally wrote this. All the updated info will be in BLUE writing.

Yesterday I tried out a new app on Facebook. Five minutes later my computer did some funky stuff! I figured out how to remove unwanted apps & found there were a ton in there that had been sitting for 6 months or more. I asked through my Facebook Status if I should I write a post on how to remove unwanted apps, and the consensus was YES PLEASE!

So do this when you have about 10 mins of free time.  It's easy enough to do, but once you see how many applications are sitting there, I'm sure you'll be as shocked as I was.  The problem is you have to remove them one at a time.

• Login to Facebook
• Click on Account (top right corner) -top  blue bar, beside the little lock there is an astrix/flowery type icon click on that
• From the dropdown menu pick Privacy Setting
• In the new window that popped up, scroll down to the bottom -actually its now in the left side bar
• In the bottom left corner under Apps and Websites click Edit Your Settings - just click on where it say apps and a new window will open
• Under Apps You Use you will see a few listed right under that you'll see Remove unwanted or spammy apps, click that -now it just lists all the apps

Now is the time consuming part

• A listing of all of your apps will show up on the screen
• To the far right of the app is a little "x" click it to remove the app
• Then another little box will show up asking if you're removing and you hit okay
• Then it goes back to the listing screen and click the "x"' 's for each one (and a dialouge confirmation box will pop up each time too)

Now feel good that you've decluttered something today!
If this tip was helpful, please leave a comment so I know if you'd like to see more hints and tricks!

Keep Smiling!
Lisa

Facebook Profile Maker

I just found out from my pal Breanne how to simplify the process when making a new profile page now that Facebook has changed to THE NEW PROFILE.

It's very easy just go to http://apps.facebook.com/profile-maker/ then upload a picture.  Next drag the cusor around in the left pane until you have it set the way you want it.  After that push the slider on the zoom tool to how big you want it to appear (you may have to readjust the left pane again) & click create profile.  In under a minute you'll get a message saying choose this as your profile pic (bottom right corner of the pic screen) & BOOYA! Success!

As always mine is all about the TIARA !!!

Go ahead & try it yourself. Then post you profile link in my comments I'd love to see how creative everyone will be!

My Brushes With Fame 2011

This collage shows only part of the fantastic things that happened to me this year.
If you don't know all of the people in the photos, you should!  See their listings below the collage!

1. Start of Dan for Mayor Fred Ewanuick -he was the Parade Marshall for the Oktoberfest Parade (& apologized for not being Ellen)
2. Actress Patty Sullivan (Diane is in this pic & I took it) See her on CBC or starring on stage (after her maternity leave that is)
3. Yummy Mummy Extrodinare Erica Ehm (@ Kathy Buckworth's book launch)
4. Brendan O'Carroll creator of Mrs. Brown's Boys (in Toronto)
5. Members of the band Mariana's Trench @ Hockeyfest
6. Kathy Buckworth author/humourist @ her Springridge Farms event
7. Fitz The Whip Vanderpool Boxing Champion @ Kidspark
8. Brenda Halloran Mayor of Waterloo @MeFest
9. Sue Warden of HGTV Canada's Craftscapes @ Season's Christmas Show
10. Carlos Benevides Radio personality of 91.5 The Beat & Moustache enthusiast @ Movember Kick Off
11. Dee Brun aka The Cocktail Deeva, what doesn't she do? Author, Bar Chef, Humourist TIARA WEARER!!!! @ Toronto Home Show
12. Mike Holmes of HGTV's Holmes on Homes @ WLU
13. John Placko of the Maple Leaf commercials @ ShesConnected Conference
14. Silks the Prize Guy Radio personality of 91.5 the Beat who we always run into at random places (as you can see by the pic)
15. Academy Award Winning Procducer of Titanic & Avatar Jon Landau @ The Museum (also w/ his Oscar!)
16. Scott Stratten author/public speaker who was awesome enough to mention MeFest in his book (page 236 go look it up-I know you own it)